Author: paultobey

One of the biggest challenges that I hear from tinnitus (constant ringing in the ears) patients is their inability to get a good night’s sleep. I used to have this problem as well, so I am very familiar with how frustrating that is. Imagine what it might be like to sleep on a busy airport runway with jets taking off all around you. That’s what it’s like for me. For many people who suffer from this debilitating disease, they can be kept awake by constant hissing, roaring, pulsing, whooshing, chirping, whistling and even clicking sounds that interfere with their regular sleep patterns.

Unfortunately, the less sleep you get, the more your tinnitus will bother you. Why this is I’m not sure, except to know that if you’re tired it’s much harder to keep motivated and do the things you need to do to keep your mind off tinnitus. I do know, however, that it’s very important to get at least 8 hours of sleep each night in order to avoid what often feels like an increase in the tinnitus volume.

So, how do you get a good night’s sleep? That’s really a 2 part question because first you have to get to sleep and then you have to stay asleep. I can’t tell you the number of times that tinnitus would actually wake me up in the middle of the night. Once awake, it’s virtually impossible to get back to sleep. Many patients admit that their tinnitus is much worse after waking from sleep and I definitely agree with this based on my own experience.

First, let’s talk about how to get to sleep. After experimenting for several years I came up with a formula that works for me and I truly believe it can work for you too. And, like David Letterman I call it; the top ten ways for tinnitus patients to fall asleep. But this is no joke!

Number Ten: Make sure you’re physically tired. This seems like such a simple thing but it can really help to be just absolutely fatigued when you hit the pillow.

Number Nine: Don’t watch TV before going to bed. It fills your mind with useless nonsense and more often than not, your mind will race with useless information as a result of the subject matter.

Number Eight: Don’t exercise right before bed. This will raise your adrenalin and give you energy. Energy is the last thing you want when trying to sleep.
Number Seven: Don’t eat after 8:00 pm. Avoid volume raising tinnitus foods like caffeine, salt, alcohol, etc.

Number Six: If you can, meditate before bed. It will help to relax you and rid your body of any stress it is carrying. Breathe Deeply. Most of us go through our lives taking short breaths. A deep breath is grounding.

Number Five: Learn to relax in bed as if it were a rewarding experience. Relax each part of your body as you focus on relaxing it. Start with the top of your head and work your mind down to the tip of your toes. Very often I would only get to my knees and I’d be asleep.

Number Four: Try not to habituate yourself to loud noise when you are falling asleep. Avoid leaving the TV and/or radio on. If you can, open the window and listen to nature. If you must listen to something, make it a natural environmentally friendly sound, so when it’s not there, you won’t miss it.

Number Three: Make sure the room is dark so your brain tells your body it’s time to rest.

Number Two: Don’t Think! I know that seems like an odd concept but the fact is, thinking is what keeps your mind active and that keeps you awake.

And, the Number One way to fall asleep is: If all else fails, make love!

When you make love, you are not thinking about your tinnitus and at the same time you are setting up your body to accept sleep. The magic in that is that you are NOT thinking! The mind is trained to think. Do you realize how little time you spend in your day not thinking? The trouble is that most people have never learned to not think. I saw an ad on television once for a large newspaper chain and their slogan was; Never Stop Thinking. This is utter nonsense. You need time away from thinking – especially if your thoughts are negative or stressful.

So, how do you stop thinking? If you’re familiar with meditation then you likely have a good idea how this works. It’s a simple concept but believe me it takes practice. The more you practice it the better you’ll get at it. I use this technique to cat nap during the day and it works every single time. And, here it is: Relax and let your mind wander. When your mind falls on a thought, don’t follow it. Don’t focus on that thought. Say to yourself, oh I just landed on a thought let my mind go back to wandering. Don’t fight it, just allow your mind to drift onto other thoughts. It’s when your mind lands on a thought and follows that thought through a series of mental movies that causes stress and ultimately keeps you awake. Like I said, it takes practice, but it can be done.

Now, how do you stay asleep? That’s an easy one. If you’re tired when you go to bed you have a high probability that you will stay asleep. If you happen to wake up because of a dream or a loud noise, simply go through the ten steps all over again. Have a good night’s sleep!

Paul Tobey is a professional concert pianist who uncovered a healing path for his Ringing Ears without the aid of drug therapy or medical intervention. Paul has trained thousands of people in both professional and personal development. For access to the Tinnitus Seminar and eBook…

Click here to read about it.

By this time, in this series of 52 articles, you’re probably feeling that the information is helping you in some way. Otherwise, you would have unsubscribed a long time ago. That doesn’t necessarily mean that you agree with everything I write and I thoroughly don’t expect you to.

But, I would like to think that if you’re still with me, you do agree at least on some level with the things I believe in and the behaviours I subscribe to. Well, today I’m going to test that level of trust… to the max.

If you get through this article, while still deciding not to unsubscribe, then I know you’re on the right tract and well on the way to healing yourself not only from your tinnitus but from your negative beliefs.

You see, your beliefs are not necessarily your own. They’ve been taught to you by others such as your parents, friends, colleagues, teachers, television, media etc. There are many people out there with a belief system that includes only what they can see and that’s the predominate state of our culture.

But, there is a great shift in energy occurring right now, however you won’t be hearing about it on the news tonight. Why? Because it’s not drama or newsworthy according to the norms of society.

What is this shift?

The shift is clearing yourself of any attachment to your negative past and then moving towards your ultimate goals. Of course your goals have to be bold otherwise what would be the point? But, the focus here is on ridding yourself of the attachment that you have to your dramas and un-empowering thoughts and feelings.

This could be a failed relationship, a health trauma, a bad business decision or anything else that you hold onto that drains you of your ability to move forward.

This is not easy for most people. Our attachment to our beliefs is strong. Notice your recurring thought processes and you’ll notice that I’m telling you the truth. Our minds are addicted to drama and negativity. Therefore, it’s not what you don’t know that’s holding you back it’s what you know that ain’t necessarily so.

For example; if you think bad news comes in threes then it comes in threes. If you think money is hard to come by it will be. If you focus on how you hate to pay bills you’ll get more bills and much less than enough to pay for them.

What you need to do is stop your mind’s association with whatever has happened in your past or is currently happening that you don’t want. There are many ways to do this but I like the one I’m about to share with you. (This is the scary part, or the part where you start to think I might be a little crazy, but I’m willing to take that risk.)

Many people who attend my seminars know that I’m a learn-it-all. That means I’m constantly trying to gather information from various sources like books, audio tapes and other seminars. Then I use that information to improve my life and the lives of others. And, I don’t teach it to anyone until at least I’ve had some success with it.

Before I go on I want you to remember the term ‘learn-it-all’ because it cancels out the know-it-all in you that says you know everything and have an opinion on everything. The fact is; if you haven’t already got everything you want out of life then plainly you don’t know it all so you have to stop acting and behaving like you do. If you’ve heard about it, read about it or talked about it then you don’t know it.

So, the learn-it-all in me is going to refer to a system taught to me by one of the great spiritual and success gurus of our time; Dr. Joe Vitale. Know as “Mr. Fire”, Joe has had countless best sellers and his online learning materials are highly sought after.

In Joe’s book “The Attractor Factor” he talks about clearing out your negativity to allow for good things to come in. The idea is; that you can’t fill up with positive energy before you clear out the bad energy. Makes sense, doesn’t it? Many people think that you can just shift from one to the other but I believe like Joe does. I think it’s a process of re-programming that happens over time.

Here is the clearing out exercise that he talks about in his book. By the way, he didn’t make it up either. He got it from Karol Truman author of Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. And, it goes like this…

All you have to do is repeat the following script when you want to manifest anything in your life while inserting, where appropriate, the feelings that you have about whatever it is you’re trying to manifest.

This is not complicated and may seem too simple to actually work, but it does. So, if you choose not to do it, don’t say that it doesn’t work because then you wouldn’t have proof. Think of something you want to have in your life that you don’t have right now and think about the feeling you would have if you had it. The stronger the feeling, the better this will work.

Repeat these words, exactly…

Spirit, please locate the origin of my feeling/thought about feeling negative about (Insert the feeling or belief that you want to release here.)

Take each and every, level, layer and aspect of my being to this origin. Analyze and resolve it perfectly, with universal truth.

Come forward in time with, healing every incident based upon the foundation of the first, according to universal will; until I’m at the present, filled with light and truth, God’s peace and love, forgiveness of myself for my incorrect perceptions, forgiveness of every person, place, circumstance and event which contributed to this feeling/thought.

With total forgiveness and unconditional love I delete the old from my DNA, release it and let it go NOW! If feel (insert the way you want to feel here) !! I allow every physical, mental, spiritual and emotional problem and inappropriate behaviour based on the old feelings to quickly disappear.

Thank you, Spirit, for coming to my aid and helping me attain the full measure of my creation. Thank you, thank you, thank you and praise God from whom all blessings flow.

Simple.

Now, if you don’t believe the script will work, go back and redo the script based on the though/feeling that you have about the script.

How many times do you need to do this? Once for each negative feeling or thought you have and how you would like to change it for a more empowering thought.

It may seem too simple to be effective but you would be wrong. In fact, you’d be making a big mistake. Just do it and see what happens.

I can only speak from my own experience but I believe that replacing old negative behaviours and thoughts for new ones will have a huge positive effect in your life. As I’ve said before it’s a constant moment to moment monitoring process. So, if you start to feel negative about anything, whip out this script and do it on that thought.

 

Paul Tobey is a professional motivational speaker who has performed many seminars for ringing ears sufferers and is author of Tinnitus Free Living a Tinnitus Handbook Self Help Guide which helps people reduce their tinnitus volume.

I’d like to share with you a phone call that I received recently from Susan (pseudo-name) who lives Myrtle Beach, South Carolina.

She had called me in regards to my tinnitus-free-living program. She had some questions about the program and of course wondered if she should get it or not. In other words, would it work for her?

So, naturally I had some questions of my own. I found out that she has had tinnitus for over 15 years and that it had severely affected the quality of her life. Without going into great detail, she has attempted suicide as a result of her tinnitus and has taken anti-depressants as well as sleeping pills in order to get a night’s rest.

Now, her story is not an uncommon story, I hear it all the time. But what struck me about our conversation that I’d like to share with you was when I asked her this question, “Have you ever been happy?”

Immediately following this question was a lengthy pause to which she responded, “No, I don’t think so.”

So, my next question was, “Do you know that it’s simply a choice that you make?” I was trying to get her to see that her unhappiness was caused by her and not the tinnitus. She of course was not convinced. But, I kept at it and eventually asked her another question which floored her.

I asked, “Has anyone ever taught you HOW to be happy?”

Well, I thought she was going to fall off her chair and drop the phone. I could sense that there was this sudden realization that – NO – no one had ever taught her how to be happy. Not her parents, not her teachers and not anyone that she ever new.

So, I responded, “My program will teach you how to be happy. That’s its main purpose.”

I went on to explain that the more happy you are, the more you are in control of your tinnitus. And, eventually if you keep it up, your tinnitus will literally fade into a distant memory.

I taught her a phrase which I use constantly in my life, “I choose to be happy now.”

The problem is that as humans, we are conditioned to expect better things in our lives so that we can be happy. So, we’re always waiting for better conditions to arrive. Somehow, they never do.

When you look to the future for something to happen that will make you happy, you will always be disappointed. Why? Because you miss the only time there ever is and that is the NOW!

When the future arrives it will be now. But, most people keep looking towards it for something to happen that will change the way they feel. But, you can only change the way you feel right now.

When I told the woman on the phone that my program can teach her to be happy, she couldn’t wait to get her hands on it. She obviously had more questions but in her mind it seemed to me that it was more important for her to learn how to be happy than even worrying about her tinnitus.

If you wait for your tinnitus to get better in order to feel good and be happy, you will never get there. You can only be happy now. And, if you can’t – you must!

Make it the most important decision that you can ever make. Choose it, live it and do it now.

 

Paul Tobey is a professional motivational speaker who has performed many seminars for tinnitus sufferers and is author of Tinnitus Free Living a which helps people reduce their tinnitus volume.

Everyday we miss opportunities. I witness it everyday, and am often reminded how I could have missed the biggest opportunity in my life. I watch others how they miss their opportunities to invest, opportunities to love, opportunities to be loved, opportunities to give, opportunities to receive, opportunities to forgive, opportunities to save on tax dollars, and even opportunities to witness their own missed opportunities! But the greatest opportunity in my life was and continues to be tinnitus.

For me, tinnitus was a life changing, life altering, mind-blowing opportunity. It gave me the biggest opportunity of my life – an opportunity to learn, grow and become a better human being. Now, tinnitus continues to flower my life, and continues to seed more opportunities in my life, such as the opportunity to mentor, to teach and coach others.

For a long time I saw tinnitus as an enemy, a negative energy force in my life that would systematically destroy my will to live. Actually, the ringing would actually awaken me to a new reality filled with endless oceans of opportunity.

I have no medical evidence of this, but I would say that tinnitus probably affects those people who have had to confront many “fear based opportunities” in their lifetime. If you interview people with tinnitus, you’ll see that many of them live fear based lives. They worry a lot, or have experienced some sort of trauma, or deal with serious ailments (emotional or physical).

More and more studies are now indicating that tinnitus is not actually a ringing of the ears, but rather a ringing of the brain. And the part of the brain that lights up on the technology map, is the part of the brain that experiences fear. Is this coincidence?

It would explain why some people experience some relief using prescription drugs for depression. It numbs the fear processes. However, if you think you are going to handle fear through chemicals, that’s not the answer either.

Tinnitus is the opportunity for you to learn, grow and begin of your NEW life as a new person. The more you resist the change, the more the fear will control your life; therefore, the tinnitus will continue to throw up all your fears at you. Such as, the fear of not getting better, the fear of living, the fear of failing, the fear of trying.

The way I did it, the way I healed my tinnitus, was to heal the parts of myself that was fearful and in pain. It didn’t take one day. It took 4 years before I began to really get it. And, sometimes, I still see the opportunity to learn and heal those parts of myself that cause me pain (and fear).

Just yesterday, two people walked out from my seminar. I was teaching internet marketing, but the first hour, I dedicate to personal development. There is no point teaching a man to fish if the man has no motivation to fish. My ideas sometimes challenge some people. Still, when they walk out, my ego goes straight to fear and starts the little voice saying things like “see, your still not perfect!”.

I really don’t aspire to be perfect (well maybe at the piano), but the truth of it is, my fear of not living up to someone’s else’s expectations still haunt me. It takes practice for me to let it go. I usually just practice not going to the fear by reminding myself “it’s not my stuff, that’s their stuff”. If my intention is authentic, then why bother go to the fear?

Having faith in something helps tremendously. I married a Catholic woman whose parents are staunch Catholics. I’m a minister’s son raised in the United Church. Not wanting to offend anybody, and having a lot of fear about the outcome, we didn’t go through the ceremony of baptism for our son.

I’m not sure if anyone noticed, but no one ever said anything! Our faith and belief systems play a large role in our lives. It’s not something we practice on Sundays in a place of brick and mortar. We live “it” everyday.

And there are two things I practice with deep awareness. I practice being grateful for the things I do have in my life. The second thing is I practice being aware of my fear based energies, reactions, words, actions, attitudes, beliefs, etc. I don’t focus on my fears. I just choose to be aware of my fears when they come up. Recognizing my fears gives me the opportunity to choose a different thought or feeling, hence changing my life.

I have the two reminders on the wall next to the toilet! No kidding. They are blue plastic cards pinned up next to the roll. So everyday, first thing in the morning I see the question: “What are you grateful for? And “What opportunities can you be aware of right now?”

Gratitude and awareness – it’s that simple. Just be aware that the opportunities in your life are abundant. You just need to awaken to be able to recognize them. Tinnitus is one of those opportunities in your ocean of opportunities.

Paul Tobey is a professional motivational speaker who has performed many seminars for ringing ears sufferers and is author of Tinnitus Free Living a Tinnitus Handbook Self Help Guide which helps people reduce their tinnitus volume.

Tinnitus is a serious and growing health risk in the music industry. Musicians, audio engineers, live production crews, and even concert goers are at risk of developing debilitating ringing in the ears and other hearing damage.

As a professional pianist, speaker, trainer and tinnitus patient my message for you is this; no one is immune to tinnitus caused by exposure to loud noise. And, whether I’m speaking to the American Music Teachers Association, Tinnitus support groups or a growing online audience, I always sing the same tune, “Protect your ears at all cost.”

I contracted Tinnitus in early January 2001, and overnight I began to experience a constant high pitched ringing sound which stretched across my entire brain. The ringing was so intense that not even the high tech equipment at the Canadian Hearing Centre in Toronto could measure it.

Tinnitus stopped me dead in my tracks and kept me from performing concerts for two whole years. I couldn’t focus, I couldn’t sleep and I couldn’t concentrate. I was immobilized by the incessant drone and it whipped me straight into a serious depression.

After traveling the world in search of a cure from traditional medical professionals to no avail, I eventually turned to natural healers, shamen, gurus, and dozens of promising natural therapies that only proved one thing; there is no cure… well, not yet anyway.

When I was young, no one told me that the high decibels from a violin, saxophone, trumpet or piccolo could damage my ears. No one ever said that I needed to wear ear protection in rehearsals or on the gig. And if they did, I probably was too ignorant to believe that it could happen to me.

In the last 2 years I have heard hundreds of stories, just like mine, from tinnitus sufferers from across the globe. And, hundreds more have subscribed to my “Tinnitus Free Living” program which I deliver over the internet.

It’s difficult to describe how much pain some people are in. Many are suffering physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally. They feel isolated, not only because doctors can’t help them but because no one understands or can sympathize.

Some move towards anger and some retreat into depression. For many, the ringing is so bad that they feel they’re going insane.

It is very difficult for some tinnitus sufferers to come to terms with their condition. Tinnitus can completely change a person’s life. But, the reality is; a person with debilitating tinnitus can’t remain the same.

Some tinnitus sufferers have to make serious life changes to cope. This can include a complete change in diet like giving up caffeine, alcohol, white flour, salt and sugars. It can mean giving up a job, or leaving a situation that is creating high stress. It can mean embarking on a huge spiritual and emotional shift. If people are suffering, it’s a sign that something has to change.

And ‘change’ is what I encourage. I inspire people to embrace change, because with change comes the freedom from suffering. Fighting, resisting, blaming, complaining and playing the victim doesn’t work. Never has, never will! Unless a person is willing to change from the inside out, they will continue to suffer.

Just this past spring, a mother emailed me to inform me that her son couldn’t cope with Tinnitus and that he had committed suicide. She also wanted to thank me because she believed that my program had helped him. In his case it was obviously too little, too late.

It’s because of people like that, that I do what I do. I was there. I was in her son’s shoes. I lived the experience that he lived and I came out the other side. I see it now as my duty to help in any way I can.

There are millions of people around the world who suffer from tinnitus. And thousands more join the ranks each and every day. When new tinnitus sufferers find me on the internet they always ask the same question, “How do even begin to cope?”

Learning how to cope, or change is what defines us and measures our resolve. And, choosing change over resistance is a journey that is well worth taking.

In the meantime, don’t just sit around and hope that tinnitus doesn’t happen to you. If you think you might be at risk, take the necessary steps to protect your ears before it’s too late.

Paul Tobey is a concert jazz pianist, professional public speaker and trainer whose “Tinnitus Free Living” program has helped hundreds of tinnitus patients worldwide. For more information visit; www.paultobey.com/tinnitus

Many people with tinnitus complain that the ringing they hear is often worse first thing in the morning than at any other time in the day. Why is that and what can you do about it?

Conventional wisdom holds that when you lie down for extended periods of time there is more blood flow to the brain. Since the brain is responsible for the sound you hear, the ringing noise is heightened because of the extra blood flow.

It also seems louder in the morning because there is much less ambient noise then at any other time during the day. Therefore, because of these 2 occurrences, your tinnitus appears to be louder.

However, conventional wisdom will only take you so far. In other words, just knowing the cause does not necessarily equate into a workable solution. In fact, it’s just the opposite. More often than not, knowing that your tinnitus will be louder in the morning will actually cause you to immediately focus your mind on it as soon as you wake up.

The mind wants to feel bad. It’s the way you’ve been conditioned. The mind is addicted to negativity. Therefore, as soon as you regain so-called consciousness in the morning, your mind automatically gravitates to what’s wrong. Then it seeks out situations to prove that it’s right. It says, “see, I told you tinnitus is a bad thing.” Then when you try to do something about it the mind says, “not now, I’m busy. Can’t you see I’m focused on tinnitus? I’ll wait till later to feel better.”

So, just knowing that you brain does that, seeks out negativity, how does that help you? That’s what most people struggle with. Even if they know that’s what the mind does, it’s often too difficult to fix. Why? Because, most people don’t have a clue how to stop it.

You have always been a victim of your past, as the mind sees it. Past experiences get stored in your sub-conscious. As soon as you’ve experienced anything, your mind makes a file called “past experience #890765” and, when that situation comes up your mind seeks out that very computer file and uses it to strengthen itself. The mind says, “ah, another morning with tinnitus, great! Another excuse to feel bad.”

So, what can you do? Here’s what I did and still do; get up, get moving and get focused on anything that you can do that you love to do. For example; if you love to takes walks, take one first thing in the morning. If you love to play the piano, sit down and play the piano. Whatever it takes to get your mind off the tinnitus, do that. The worst thing you can do is to lie in bed and focus on your tinnitus until it makes you into its permanent victim.

Sure, your mind wants to focus on your tinnitus. I know that from experience. But, it’s up to you to stop it. Taking a different kind of action will help. But, that action must be performed from only 1 of 3 positive energy modalities; acceptance, enjoyment or enthusiasm.

Because everything is energy; thought, feeling, doing, living, breathing, wind, rain, sun, fire, ice, water, sleep etc., you must realize that only positive energy will cancel out negative energy. Your thinking about tinnitus is negative energy. Therefore only 1 of the 3 energy modalities I suggested will get you out of your negative mind and into happiness.

The least level of energy that you can use is acceptance. Complete 100% acceptance that your tinnitus is here to stay is the first step. But, you must accept it without resistance. As I’ve said before, resistance stops the positive flow of energy. What you resist will continue to persist.

Acceptance, on the level of energy, causes real consciousness to occur. Real consciousness on the level beyond form (what you can see, hear, taste, touch and smell) is that all-knowing universal wisdom that oversees everything that you do. Your personal growth and happiness depends on this consciousness to take hold and witness your life from the level of the “formless”.

You are the director in the play. That is consciousness. There person, who you think you are, is the actor in the play. Therefore, you can direct the actor, from the level above form which is the level of the formless. That is the level which, as a human race, we must reach if we are to survive.

Knowing that you must accept tinnitus is fine but, you must go beyond that and direct your form self to behave differently. Direct the actor to do something which will get you what you want. Allowing the actor (your doubting mind) to improvise is just plain wrong. Your mind will improvise you to death. Don’t allow it to do that.

Give universal direction. Give direction from the level of formless consciousness that resides deep within you. I know that you know it’s there. You must tap into that creative magnetic energy and make it work for you.

If you continue to wake up every morning and allow your mind to improvise and gravitate toward negativity, you will be doomed for the rest of your life. Nothing will change.

On the other hand, if you choose to alter your behaviour and direct the actor from a position of positive power you will change the direction of your life. You may not see results instantly, because you’ve not yet trained yourself to get the full effect. But, you will see results, only up until your mind goes back in the other direction and starts whining and complaining that you don’t yet see any results.

Simply let go, and let it happen. I’ll be there to help keep you on track as much as I can. Fell free to write me and let me know how it’s working for you.

 

Paul Tobey is a professional motivational speaker who has performed many seminars for tinnitus sufferers and is author of Tinnitus Free Living a which helps people reduce their tinnitus volume.

Just this past weekend I had a somewhat older gentleman than myself come up to me while we were on break at my internet marketing course. He had learned about my tinnitus during the course and wanted to speak to me about it.

It turns out that he was a colonel in the military and as such was exposed to loud noises like rapid gun fire and bombing. He began suffering from severe tinnitus 9 years ago and by his account, had also suffered from depression and anxiety.

He was very sincere about his struggle with tinnitus but at the same time I couldn’t help noticing that he wanted to compare his tinnitus with mine. He said things like, “the doctors told me it was one of the worst cases they have ever seen,” and “you can’t possibly understand how bad it is every single day.”

While that may be true, it’s the way he built his ego or identity out of tinnitus that troubles me. You see, when you attach who you are with something like tinnitus it’s the mind’s way of building up itself. It’s the mind’s ego that wants to be different, feel superior or feel victimized. Either way, it’s still EGO.

Children first learn the negative power of the ego when they say things like, “look how fast I can run, I bet you can’t do that!” The mind creeps in at an early age to try and distinguish itself from the rest of the world. It does its best to feel superior, inferior, troubled and even mediocre.

So, when I come across someone like this gentleman, who tries to make his tinnitus more important than mine what should I say to him? How do I help him? I know he’s stuck in a place of ego but I also know that I can’t just blurt out something that I think will help. I have to really think about how “what I say” will be received. It can backfire significantly if I try to help others who don’t want to be helped.

Do you want to know what I said to him? I said, “Are you willing to keep and open mind?” He looked at me confused and asked, “what do you mean?”

I related to him, based on my experience, that keeping an open mind allows me to be open to learning and not be a “know-it-all.” “I’m a learn-it-all,” I exclaimed, “and, as such I am open to allowing into my life whatever knowledge or healing that comes to me.

I also said that I believed he could do this and that I would do my best in the rest of the course to see that any life altering information that I possessed would reveal itself.

Sometimes that’s all you can do. It’s not that he was closed off to learning; it’s just that he was so attached to his tinnitus story that he couldn’t see the forest through the trees. If I had said that he was wrong, or that he was going about it the wrong way it could have easily backfired.

Like I said, sometimes people don’t want to be helped. In that case, all I can do is make small comments like “keep an open mind” when, really all they want to hear is your sympathy. And, as you may know that won’t help them at all. It just feeds their ego even more. Saying things like, “oh that’s too bad, or I feel so sorry for you,” won’t help in any way.

So, how can you use this information in your life and how will it help you? As I’ve mentioned many times before in my articles, the more you help people the more you help yourself. The positive energy that you put out instead of trying to make others wrong or feel inferior will come back to you. What you give out you get back! True? Of course.

Just make it your intention to be a good listener when someone reveals information to you. Then, make it your intention to help. And, if all that is required is to listen and offer small suggestions, based on where the person is as in their life, then that’s what you do.

Don’t try to be superior in any way. Don’t look down on them and think you’re better. Just hold the space for a while and listen. Then, make any comments you feel that are appropriate but you’re your comments on your own experience. Remember, if you don’t show it, you don’t know it.

Paul Tobey is a concert pianist, motivational speaker who discovered a path to healing Tinnitus without medical intervention. His self-help book on reducing Ringing Ears Volume is a popular Ringing in the Ears Download.

We live in a results based world and results represent the fruits of our actions. The problem is; when it comes to taking action, very few people know what kind of action to take.

There are only 2 kinds of actions; one based on fear and the other based on faith. Usually the action that most people take is one based on fear. In others words, most people try to avoid disaster rather than planning on success.

That’s the way it is with tinnitus. Most people would rather avoid the negative effects of tinnitus rather than have faith that they can actually heal it.

The reason for this is simple; it’s the way we’ve been programmed. From a very young age we’ve learned from our environment how to act, think, feel and take action.

If I were to right the formula for any results it would look like this; E => T => F => A = R. Environment leads to our thoughts, which leads to our feelings, which makes us take a certain type of action, which then give us our results.

Therefore, if the environment that you are surrounded by, which includes family, friends, media and so on, is a negative one, then your thoughts and feelings created by that negative environment will be based on fear. The good new is; you can change it.

The first thing you want to do is remove yourself from the toxic environment that you’re living in. While that may not be easy, it is essential to your success and results based initiatives. If you are constantly surrounded by negative people and negative news you will reap negative results.

Start hanging out in places where people are more successful and more positive than you are. Pretty soon, you will think, talk and act like them.

When you do this, your fear based thoughts will be replaced with positive and empowering thoughts. Your mind will, over time, become reprogrammed to expect positive results rather than trying to avoid negative ones. You see, the subconscious mind cannot discern the difference between positive and negative, it only responds to the dominant thoughts that you have and gives you what you expect.

The reason for this is simple; your thoughts create your feelings and your feelings are what activate the law of attraction. You will attract to you the exact energy of your dominant feelings. For example; if you’re afraid that your tinnitus will get worse, this activates the law of attraction which will give you exactly what you expect.

I realize that this is the way most people act. But, if you are to live a completely fulfilled and abundant tinnitus free life, you must understand this, prepare for it and live it every moment of the day. Your feelings are what give you your results, based on the actions that you take. If you act out of the fear of loss then you will lose. However, if you act out of the expectation that you will get what you want, then you will receive it. Guaranteed.

The problem is, like I’ve already mentioned, it’s the way we’ve been programmed to think, feel and act that gives us what we get. All you have to do is start thinking, feeling and acting different and you will get what you want instead of what you don’t want.

As easy as this may seem, it’s probably the most difficult thing you will ever have to do. That’s why it’s so important to surround yourself with people and situations that are empowering rather than negative. If you just start to think, act and behave like successful people you will become one. Fake it until you make it.

Your subconscious mind is the most powerful force in the universe and you must trick it into believing that you can get what you want. When you start to get it however, don’t freak out. What is delivered to you may not be what you expect or even want in the beginning. But, you must understand that it’s the most effective and efficient path that is reveling itself. Try not to resist what is happening. If you do, you will go right back into your old programming and ask yourself, “why hasn’t it happened yet.” It is happening. You just need to have faith that whatever is happening is the way it is supposed to be.

Remember, action is the bridge between your inner thoughts and your physical results. But, the action that you take is determined by your thoughts and feelings. Change them first and you will take the appropriate action based on the circumstances that are presented to you.

In the case of tinnitus, what you will need to do first is hang out with people who have what you want. Then, try not to complain to anyone about your tinnitus. Then, start copying the people that do have what you want and eventually you will trick your mind into believing that it is inevitable that you will get it. Once your mind is tricked enough, you will have it.

 

Paul Tobey is a professional motivational speaker who has performed many seminars for ringing ears sufferers and is author of Tinnitus Free Living a Tinnitus Handbook Self Help Guide which helps people reduce their tinnitus volume.

Do you recall the day you traded in your guitar for a job at the bank or gave up your piano lessons to become a doctor? Have you been thinking about rediscovering your musical roots as soon as your retirement kicks in? Are you still hoping that some day you’ll get to dust off your sax and join the local jam session? If this sounds all too familiar, you’re not alone. In fact, it’s more common than you think for people in the latter stages of life to get the itch to return to their musical beginnings.

Like most closet musicians, you likely arrived at a turning point in your life where you had to decide between the certainty of a job and the uncertainty of a life in the music business. And, like the vast majority, you chose the more stable path. Do you ever wonder though, what it would have been like if you had enough courage to pursue the other path – even if it would have totally freaked your parents out?

As a professional concert pianist I have people say to me all the time that they would give anything to do what I do. A lot of these folks wish they just could turn back the clock and get another shot at it, even if it might not have been the responsible thing to do.

That’s why I’m so grateful for the path I have chosen, not only because I love it but because, I never have to worry about what I might have missed. The truth is; I love music and what it does for my soul. I wake up every day with excitement because I really don’t know what’s going to happen or where I’ll end up. That to me is a gift, not a liability. The only thing certain in my life is uncertainty and that I can always count on.

But, our society is not programmed to think in these terms. We’re groomed in school to play it safe, get a job and pay the bills. It’s definitely the easy thing to do but is it the right thing? I think we were all born to learn something new and exciting every day. For most people who go to the same job day after day, a job they most likely hate – how is this learning?

Many people find themselves at a turning point in their latter years when they think to themselves, “What exactly happened to my dreams?” But, then you think to yourself, “I got married and had kids, it would have been completely irresponsible of me to follow my dreams because so few actually make it.” That’s true, except why couldn’t you have been one of the few?

In any case, I often say to people, “Why don’t you quit your job now while you still can?” To my mind, living every day in a situation you hate will only lead you somewhere you don’t want to go. It’s important to choose a goal in life that you really are passionate about because, that’s what will make your life exciting and challenging. Anybody can get a job.

But, even if you absolutely cannot give up your job, why not take up music seriously at the same time? For now, start practicing in secrecy. Then eventually you’ll be good enough to perform for others. And, if you’re passionate enough, you may even get to be the performer that you’ve always admired from a distance. You know, the one you’ve often cheered for with mixed delight and sorrow because, you know you could have been that person?

The good news, it’s not too late!

Take my friend Bruce for example. With three years left to go to his retirement as a bank executive, he reintroduced himself to blues guitar. Shortly thereafter he reunited his high school band and now they’re actually booking themselves for dances, concerts and private functions.

And, my friend Mary Ann is doing the same thing. She had a music degree in classical piano which, she eventually gave up to become a family doctor. Now, several years later she’s formed a jazz quartet with some friends and another doctor on drums, and the band performs at least 5 nights a month around town.

These are just two examples of people who understand that they can have it all; both a successful professional career and a life in music. Like them, you don’t have to wait for your retirement to get back to doing what you love.

So next time you feel the need to rejuvenate your life with music, come on out of the closet. Because, the truth of the matter is the only thing stopping you, is you. Take my advice and start living your life the way you want and not the way everyone else expects of you. Live the rest of your life doing what you love because, the only risk in life is not taking one.

Paul Tobey’s method of teaching is being highly acclaimed by students and teachers alike. To find out more about his piano music and motivational speaking career visit his website at http://www.paultobey.com

If you’re familiar with the work of Tony Robbins you likely love him or you hate him, there’s usually no middle ground with Tony. But, this article is not so about him, as much as it is about getting new results.

My wife Nancy and I attended Tony’s 4 Day Seminar “The Power Within” a couple of months ago and though the entire seminar was fantastic it was the fourth and final day that had the biggest impact on us.

The fourth day was all about wellness and lifestyle. Though Nancy and I go to the gym regularly, eat fairly well and generally take pretty care of ourselves, we decided to accept Tony’s 10 Day Wellness Challenge which includes the following:

No White Flour (replace with 100% whole grain or 100% rye )
No Milk Products (replace with Soy)
No Trans Fats (replace with Grape Seed Oil and Olive Oil)
No eggs (replace with egg whites)
No White Sugars (replace with fruits, natural sweets)
No Beef, Pork or Chicken (only fish with good essential oils and fats)
No booze (only water)
No coffee (replaced with mint from the garden and made mint tea)
Absolutely no junk food (no fries, fast foods, or pop drinks of any kind)
East plenty of fresh vegetables
Drink lots of water

Immediately after the seminar we started our month’s vacation in wine country in Niagara on the Lake, Ontario so it was going to be hard to avoid wine but we jumped in anyway and took up the challenge. For 10 days we followed the suggested meal plan and actually had a lot of fun cooking and exploring different ways of preparing food.

We did so well at it that after the initial 10 days, we decided to adopt the life-style and stick with it.

Now, we didn’t do this because we thought we needed to lose weight, nor was it a diet choice of any kind. However, my wife lost 14 pounds in 5 weeks, I lost 12, and we are feeling better than ever.

It’s also somewhat funny to mention but when you eat that healthy, your urine turns from yellow to white/clear. It’s the first indication that your body is back on track.

So, what is it that made us take this challenge? It was actually something that Tony Robbins had said in his seminar and it goes something like this;

We used to live in a world when you did good you got good results. Now you just get average results.

We used to live in a world when you did excellent work that you got excellent results. Now you just get good results.

We used to live in a world when if you were outstanding that you got outstanding results. Not so anymore. Now, you just get excellent results.

But, according to Tony, the goal is not to get excellent results. It’s to get OUTSTANDING RESULTS!

So, in order to get outstanding results, you must be OUTSTANDING, plus a mere two millimeters more. It’s that extra two millimeters that makes all the difference!

So, with that theory in mind, my wife Nancy and I pushed ourselves to go from excellent to outstanding plus 2 millimeters. This is now our new standard in everything we do, including making love, work, fun, play and taking care of our bodies.

Hence, without even trying, we lost weight, are in better shape, feel better, have more energy, and will probably live longer, happier days.

So what can you do to push yourself that extra 2 millimeters to get you your new outstanding results? What can you do for your tinnitus that will get you outstanding results?

The next time you gaze at yourself in the mirror, see yourself in that mirror as you would be exactly five years from now.

How do you feel? Who are you? What are you doing? Are you happy? Are you smiling? Do you like who you see? Do you like how you feel? Do you like the person in that mirror? Has that person stayed the same these past 5 years, or has that person grown?

Has that person healed, or has that person deteriorated? That person you see in the mirror, is it the person you admire? Are you proud of the person in the mirror? Did that person reach for his/her personal best plus two millimeters?

I see myself on my yacht at 50, in great shape, with a super healthy family, full of energy, life, abundance and gratitude. I truly desire to be that great smiling guy, healthy, happy, surrounded by love, energy, and lightness. A small shift in my lifestyle plus an extra 2 millimeters is all that it takes.

Here’s wishing you OUTSTANDING results plus 2 millimeters!

Paul Tobey is a professional speaker who has recorded an amazing 2-part seminar entitled “Tinnitus Free Living.” Paul was invited to give this tinnitus seminar to the Canadian Hearing Society and it is available for instant download by clicking this tinnitus treatment link.